


Park

by zhennan



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, M/M, enemies to lovers to exes to teacher and student to lovers, i honestly don't know how to tag this, lots of flashbacks, non traditional student hongjoong, slight taehyun/kai but not really, teaching assistant seonghwa, they go to a music school, unfortunately they do not make out on top of seonghwa's desk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-19
Updated: 2020-08-19
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:20:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,093
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25981999
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zhennan/pseuds/zhennan
Summary: It’s only logical that Hongjoong would end up running into his high school ex after graduation. What he was not expecting was four years later, when he goes back to school after a longer-than-needed gap year, to see Seonghwa standing in front of him, teaching the class.
Relationships: Kim Hongjoong/Park Seonghwa
Comments: 10
Kudos: 147





	Park

**Author's Note:**

> this is based off the american college system but the setting is supposed to be korea! in case you aren't very familiar, in very big auditorium style classes, the students usually get broken up into smaller groups and have to meet with a teaching assistant once a week. these meetings are called recitations and TAs usually grade their own recitation's homework and exams and review them with the class during their weekly meeting. also hongjoong mentions swiping mingi in with meal swipes, basically in order to enter buffet-style college dining halls you have to either pay with money or use a pre-paid meal swipe, and freshmen who dorm are usually required to buy a lot of meal swipes even though they don't even use that much. this note is probably SO embarrassing if college is like this everywhere lol.

“Joong, come on!” The taller, black haired boy grins at him from the top of the stairs. Hongjoong, who was trailing behind his boyfriend, pauses halfway up the steps to rest his hands on his knees and pant heavily. A hand appears in his line of sight and he can feel the butterflies flutter in his stomach once he looks up and makes eye contact. “This is the top music school in the nation, I thought you’d be more excited.”

“I am excited!” Hongjoong quickly defends himself, taking his boyfriend’s hand and allowing him to pull him up, “I just didn’t expect there to be this many stairs, Hwa.”

Seonghwa wraps his arms around him once he reaches the top. “You worry me sometimes,” he tells him, and the two giggle together as they discuss which direction they were supposed to go in and what information session they were going to attend next.

Hongjoong looks up at the same stairs five years later and sighs.

“Thanks for your help, Jongho.” Hongjoong places a hand on the younger boy’s shoulder with a grin on his face. The aforementioned Jongho quickly pushes off his hand and pretends to appear upset.

“You can’t rely on me forever, hyung, you’re lucky I didn’t have a class.” He points a finger at him, though there is no malice in his voice. “You’re a freshman now, it’s normal you don’t know where anything is, just ask someone on the street next time.”

Hongjoong crosses his arms, losing his grip on the door’s handle. “I can’t just do that, I look way older than everyone here. Some kid bumped into me and said, ‘Sorry, professor.’ Another freshman literally asked me for directions to a place I’ve never even heard of.”

“We don’t discriminate against non-traditional students here, Joongie hyung,” Jongho informs him semi-seriously, semi-jokingly. He waves the bright red haired boy goodbye before finally walking off into another direction. Hongjoong enters the classroom he was dreading to enter.

As a first year, most of Hongjoong’s classes were lectures in auditoriums with hundreds of students, so he was able to blend in the back and not talk with the people he referred to as “children” sitting next to him. However, the downside of big classes were the smaller recitation periods that accompanied them, and this was Hongjoong’s first one. Not only did he dread having to interact with younger students, but he did the math and the teaching assistant would be around his age. He doubted that he’d have to reveal his age to the class but imagining someone who might even be a little younger than him teaching him about music business just irked him and his pride.

Hongjoong takes a seat in the back of the class, behind a brunette with sloppy hair enthusiastically talking to his dark red haired friend besides him. There is still a few minutes before class actually starts, so he quickly puts his headphones on to drown out the noisy class with his favorite song. Halfway through the song, however, he notices that the sounds around him start to die down. Feeling slightly aggravated that the song is cut short, he rips his headphones off of his head and lets them rest at his neck. He can’t help but gasp loudly when he finally looks up at the teaching assistant who just walked in and was already staring back at him. The rest of the class also turn to see what the commotion was, and Hongjoong sinks into his seat.

“Good afternoon!” the TA greets, faking a smile and beginning to write his name on the board. “I’m Park Seonghwa, a graduate student in the Music Business department. Feel free to call me Seonghwa, Mr. Park, whatever’s comfortable with you.”

Not only did Hongjoong have to worry about taking classes with students four years younger than him, but now he also has to face his ex-boyfriend, who didn’t really end things on good terms four years ago.

“Most of you are first years,” Seonghwa interrupts Hongjoong’s inner crisis. “Coming to a new school might be terrifying, and you all might hate me for the icebreaker I’m about to make you guys do, but you’ll really cherish some of the friends you make in this class.” Hongjoong already knows what’s coming next. “Let’s go around and introduce ourselves. Say your name, year, major, and a fun fact about yourself. Hongjoong will start.”

He was expecting the icebreaker, not a whole exposé. The class seems confused by the unfamiliar name, so Seonghwa gestures over to Hongjoong, whose mouth is wide open. He feels his heart sink hearing that voice say his name again after four years. He struggles to make eye contact, but mumbles loud enough for the class to hear, “Hongjoong, first year, music production, and I’ve been writing songs since middle school.”

Seonghwa doesn’t say much about the introduction, he only nods towards the brunette in front of Hongjoong, signalling that his turn was next. The rest of the class period flows slowly, with everyone introducing themselves and Seonghwa responding to a few depending on their major and fun fact. He quickly goes over the syllabus, and when Hongjoong realizes that attending recitation isn’t mandatory, he already notes in his head that he’ll never come back.

The class reviews some of the first lesson, Seonghwa preparing a few practice questions and breaking them off to do it in groups. Hongjoong has to work with the brunette and his friend, but doesn’t say much other than the answers to the worksheet. The TA walks around the room in case anyone needs help, and lingers near Hongjoong, reading his answers over his shoulder. He doesn’t dare to look up at him, and Seonghwa doesn’t dare to say anything either.

Hongjoong doesn’t realize class is ending until Seonghwa announces that they’re dismissed. The other students immediately file out, leaving Hongjoong and a few others in the classroom as he packs up his belongings. For some reason, he takes his time, not wanting to leave so soon. The rest of his classmates have already left by the time he stands up and walks towards the front door.

“I’m glad you’re finally following your dreams, Joong,” Seonghwa says, and Hongjoong pauses at the door frame. “I hope I can see you next week too.”

The next week, Hongjoong doesn’t show up for recitation.

“Congrats, baby!” Hongjoong exclaims, letting go of the acceptance letter in his hands to cup Seonghwa’s face and kiss him. Seonghwa thanks him, deepening the kiss, before finally pulling away.

“What about you? I already know you got in, why aren’t you celebrating?” he asks him, and Hongjoong’s face dims.

“Yeah, I got in,” he says with a faint smile, holding his boyfriend’s hands. “We got the financial aid package too. My mom saw it and I don’t think it’s an option for me right now.”

Seonghwa lets go of Hongjoong’s hands. “What do you mean?”

“You know I’m all about the risk, Hwa. I don’t care if I have to take out loans, but my parents both don’t think it’s a good decision. They want me to give up on college and just work for them instead.”

“And you said no, right?” Seonghwa tries to look into Hongjoong’s eyes, yet already knows the answer when he avoids his gaze. The taller boy runs a hand through his hair and takes a seat. “I love your parents, but you know this isn’t what you want to do, Joong. Please, rethink this, you don’t have to give up on your dreams for them.”

Hongjoong shakes his head and sighs. “I’m not giving up on my dreams, I’m just postponing it until I have enough money to pursue them. If I go to school, especially a music school, they’re gonna stop supporting me completely. I’m scared, Hwa.”

“I know,” he responds. “I’m sorry for reacting like that, but we’ve always imagined it like this. We’d have a dorm together, taking the same classes, having study dates. I would graduate with a music business degree and open up a whole company for you.”

“We can still do that,” Hongjoong tells him, “Just a few years later.”

“I’m not sure if I could wait.”

And yet, he did, Hongjoong thinks. Rather than graduating after four years and immediately joining an entertainment company as Seonghwa planned when they broke up, he stayed at the same university to receive a graduate degree instead. A part of him wishes it was for him, but it’s been four years. Obviously, Seonghwa was sure to have forgotten about his ex-boyfriend he left behind in his hometown and started to make long-term decisions for himself instead. Right?

“Oh God, that’s what I was forgetting to tell you!” Jongho facepalms as he and Hongjoong sit opposite from each other in the dining hall. “Yeah, Seonghwa is working on his master’s right now. He never really told me why, kinda just said that he wanted to stay in school for a bit longer. Why, did you see him on campus?”

“I guess you can say that,” the elder answers, “I didn’t know you were still friends with him.”

“We thought we’d have to pick sides,” Jongho begins to explain, stuffing fries into his mouth. The “we” he mentioned referred to the rest of their friend group back in high school. “But you two were super chill about it so we kept in touch with the both of you. You were free ‘cause you weren’t in school, so I guess I visited you more often, though.”

“I really thought Seonghwa was going to get his bachelor’s, intern at some company, and work his way up.” Hongjoong sighs, leaning back in his chair. “That’s what he told me at least, but I guess something changed.”

Jongho puts his burger down carefully, looking left and right to make sure no one was listening. “Don’t tell Yeosang I told you this, but he has this conspiracy theory that Seonghwa stayed in school because he thought you would come back.”

Hongjoong’s jaw tightens. “No, I don’t think so. We broke up so long ago, he doesn’t see me in his future anymore.”

“You still like him, don’t you?” Jongho narrows his eyes at his older friend.

Hongjoong walks into class late, his head hung low after seeing his terrible midterm grade online. After tanking his first exam, he finally realized why recitation periods were so important. He avoids Seonghwa’s gaze (along with the rest of the class) as he makes his way to his empty back seat and plops down onto the chair. Seonghwa follows him, placing a booklet on his desk, which was his marked test. Hongjoong mumbles a thank you before immediately going through it, seeing his mistakes and agonizing every time he realizes he messed up something simple. For now, he ignores the note on the top that requests for him to talk with Seonghwa privately, though his heart feels heavy.

Seonghwa goes over the exam and common mistakes the students made for most of the class time. He leaves ten minutes at the end for people who have questions, a couple opting to raise their hands and blurt them aloud, while others wait for the hands to die down before going over to his desk and physically showing him the question. Hongjoong watches the crowd that forms around Seonghwa’s desk, but the boy in front of him turns around and blocks his gaze.

“Hi, sorry,” the freshman says timidly. “Did you get number seven right?”

Flipping to the seventh question, Hongjoong realizes he actually did get it right, so he nods and edges the paper towards the evidently younger boy. He thanks him with a large grin and his posture becomes less tense as he receives the paper and skims through it, eyes widening when he realizes his mistake.

“Thank you! You’re Hongjoong, right?” he asks, handing the booklet back, “Park was looking for you the first couple of recitations you missed.”

Hearing Seonghwa being called Park had reminded Hongjoong of when he first met his ex-boyfriend. They had just joined the music club at their high school and were both running for treasurer. From there, they acquired a rather competitive relationship that slowly morphed into passive aggressive interest in each other until Hongjoong had accidentally exposed his underlying feelings. The nostalgic feeling overwhelms him momentarily. “Oh, was he?” Hongjoong breaks out of it and questions, eyebrows furrowing in confusion. “That’s weird.”

“Yeah, you guys are friends, aren’t you?” the boy scratches his head. “He knew your name on the first day so I thought you knew each other already.”

“Sure, I guess so,” he answers reluctantly. “Thanks for letting me know.”

Hongjoong can almost immediately hear Jongho’s voice in his head, nagging him to ask the boy for his name so he can make at least one friend in any of his classes, but he decides against it. He didn’t need any awkward introductions, if anything he could just show up to recitation again and tap on his shoulder for help when he needed it. A part of him also believes he could do fine solely because Seonghwa is the TA and he was completely comfortable with asking Seonghwa for help. Yet when Seonghwa dismisses the class early and he realizes he has to face him again, he can feel his hands tremble already.

A few students still remain at Seonghwa’s desk, asking questions and pointing fingers at their test papers frantically. Hongjoong tells himself he should leave, contact Seonghwa through email or meet with him next week instead, but he stays seated in his chair. He packs his items back into his bag as slowly as physically possible and he can feel his heart beating so hard in his chest. He stands up and takes leisurely steps towards the front of the classroom. At this point, Seonghwa is only working with one student now, so he’s able to look up mid-explanation to make eye contact with Hongjoong. His lips curl slightly into a small smile and Hongjoong wants to collapse. He takes a step back, leaning against a desk in the first row.

Hongjoong doesn’t even hear the last student greet Seonghwa goodbye and wish him a good night. All he focuses on is the beautiful boy in front of him staring directly in his eyes. His mind is screaming Seonghwa, Seonghwa, Seonghwa and yet he can still make out his own name being uttered by the said boy’s lips.

“Why haven’t you been showing up to recitation?” he asks. This was what Hongjoong was expecting: Seonghwa’s professional, caring TA mannerisms reminding him of when they were dating. He remembers the chance that Seonghwa stayed in school waiting for him and the voice of the kid in front of him is still freshly ringing in his head. He had never gotten over his ex-boyfriend and now he clings onto the little hope that they could possibly get back together again.

“I thought I didn’t need them,” he answers honestly, trying to push back all of his other thoughts, emotions, and impulses. He reminds himself that Seonghwa must have moved on since then, that he was being delusional for even doubting it.

Seonghwa leans back into his chair. “That’s it? I just want to make sure you aren’t skipping because of me.”

“We’re adults, Hwa,” Hongjoong tries to convince himself as well, “I’m not going to avoid you over something that we’ve both moved on from.”

“Good,” he says shortly, moving onto the topic he wanted to discuss from the start. “You failed your first exam. What happened?”

Hongjoong shifts his body, completely sitting on top of the desk he had been leaning on. “I guess I just wasn’t prepared, not a big deal. I’ve got the second midterm to make up the points.”

“Then start putting the effort, Joong,” the teaching assistant tells him seriously. “I grade your homework too so I know you don’t even bother to submit them. They’re literally graded on completion and you still refuse to get the free points.”

“Seonghwa, I’ll come to recitation more often, okay?” Hongjoong stands up quickly in frustration. He grips the strap of the bag hanging on his shoulder, ready to exit soon. “I’m sure you don’t worry so much for your other students, you don’t have to nag me just because we have a past.”

“Nag you?” Seonghwa repeats in disbelief. “Yeah, we broke up, but I still care about you.”

“It’s been four years already,” he reminds him. “You don’t have to anymore. We’re basically strangers at this point. Actually, you’re the teaching assistant of my music business class. That’s it, nothing more.”

Seonghwa’s mouth feels dry. “Are you sure?”

Hongjoong can’t bring himself to lie again. “I’ll see you next week, Park.”

The red headed boy sharply turns before Seonghwa could say anything. He steps out the front door, allowing his feet to take him anywhere. The teaching assistant sits at his desk, stunned, but finds solace in hearing his surname. This wasn’t the end, it was just a new start.

“Sorry I’m late.” A young Seonghwa, aged fifteen, runs into the classroom, breathing heavily. “I wanted to apply for treasurer.”

“Oh, Hongjoong, looks like you have some competition,” one of the senior members standing in the front teases the shorter boy next to him, who only slouches in responses.

“You’re new to the club, what’s your name?” asks the boy sitting in the front most row.

“I’m Park Seonghwa,” he responds, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. “I transferred here a couple months ago so joining a club was the last thing on my mind. I’m sorry.”

“No need to be so formal,” another senior tells him. “Come on, put your stuff down, we were just about to start the speeches.”

Seonghwa rushes to put his bag and jacket down at one of the desks. He quickly takes a place next to Hongjoong, who he recognized from his class. Hongjoong was staring at the floor with his hands balled into fists, not bothering to acknowledge his classmate’s presence besides him.

“Alright.” The senior that was standing in front claps his hands. “Now that everyone’s here, we’ll be starting the speeches. Nothing too long, just a quick introduction and why you want to be whatever position you’re running for. We’ll start from secretary and make our way up. Sujeong’s running unopposed, but we’ll hear from her anyways.”

The girl at the other end of the line takes a step forward and introduces herself and what grade she’s in. She talks a little about her experience in the club and with music in general, and how she’ll be pleased to help the club out as a secretary. Hongjoong tunes this all out, fiddling with his thumbs and mumbling to himself, practicing his speech because he hadn’t prepared one; he thought he was running unopposed. Seonghwa, right next to him, finds himself hyper aware of the boy’s nervous gestures and becomes distracted, only to snap out of it when the room begins to clap.

“That was great, Sujeong! Congratulations on becoming our new secretary,” the senior, who Seonghwa discovers is Lee Jihoon after finally reading his name tag, says. He assumes he’s the president of the music club, considering he was in control of the entire meeting. “Let’s move onto treasurer then! Since we have two candidates, who wants to go first?”

Seonghwa glances at his opponent and remembers his anxious behavior. He opens his mouth to volunteer himself but Hongjoong beats him to it, stepping forward.

“I’ll go first.” He grins. “I’m Kim Hongjoong, a first year. A lot of you already know me because I’ve been a part of the club since I entered the school, but I started making music and rapping when I was twelve. I would really be honored to serve you all as your treasurer, I promise my passion for music will translate very well into this role. Thank you!”

The room claps and Jihoon glances at Seonghwa. “Um, I’m Park Seonghwa. I’m also a first year, but I transferred into the school in April. I love to sing, so when I heard there was a music club I realized I had to be part of it some way or another. I’m also very interested in business, and I kind of like math, so I would love to be treasurer. Thank you as well.”

“Oh, Park Seonghwa!” a classmate Seonghwa recognizes as Keonhee cheers while the rest of the club members clap. “Our grade’s first in math!”

“You were first place in math?” the senior sitting in the front row, with a name tag that reads Choi Junhong, repeats. “It’s like you were born to be a treasurer! Hongjoong, what did you rank?”

“Hey, my rank doesn’t matter!” Hongjoong reacts defensively. “Are you really gonna elect someone who hasn’t ever showed up just because they can do things a calculator can do?”

“Hongjoong’s in the top twenty, he’s not too bad either,” the boy sitting next to Keonhee brings up. “Besides, he’s like top five for literature instead.”

“Okay, let’s continue, shall we?” Jihoon interrupts, a bit aggravated that the students were changing the subject. “Seonghwa, Joong, you guys can take a seat. Now we’ll hear from the vice president candidates.”

Hongjoong grumpily takes the nearest seat and Seonghwa sits down next to him, despite the glare he sends him in response. The next few speeches go by relatively fast since most of them knew each other and didn’t care for competition. After the last candidate for president sits down, papers are passed around for people to write their votes on. The votes are tallied up, and Hongjoong stares blankly at the dry erase board that reads he and Seonghwa received eight votes each.

Jihoon lets out a laugh. “Looks like Joong and Seonghwa will be co-treasurers next year.”

“It was a lovely competition. Let’s work well together,” Seonghwa smiles, holding his hand out to Hongjoong for him to shake. He sighs, giving him a hi-five instead.

“I’ll deal with you for the club, but we are not friends, Park.”

Hongjoong stops recalling the distant high school memory when he hears his name being called by the Starbucks employee. He stares at the two cups of coffee ready for him and takes a deep breath to prepare himself. It’s been eight years since he called his ex-boyfriend by his last name, but now he scribbles it in big letters onto the grande iced americano (with mocha) held in his hands.

He crashes into the recitation classroom only two minutes late, yet Seonghwa has already started teaching. The teaching assistant glances at the student’s entrance and smiles slightly before looking back at the white board he was writing on. Hongjoong feels a rush of adrenaline putting the drink on Seonghwa’s desk, but is glad that he was too busy to see it himself. He takes his usual seat behind the brunette boy and his red haired friend, who watches him and tilts his head.

When Seonghwa introduces an exercise to work on in groups, the red haired boy immediately turns his body towards Hongjoong. “Are you and Park a thing?” he asks.

The older boy widens his eyes and lets go of his pen. “What? No way.”

“You literally brought him coffee,” he argues, “And he knew your name on the first day. Aren’t you guys around the same age too?”

“Are you calling me old?” Hongjoong retaliates, and the red haired boy laughs.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you, but it’s kind of obvious that you’re a senior,” he tells him.

He decides not to correct the younger boy not only because then he would have to explain his situation, but also because he noticed Seonghwa edging towards them as he walked around to check on students’ progress. The brunette boy mutters an apology for his friend before pretending like they were talking about the exercise the entire time. His voice gets louder and the redhead joins when Seonghwa finally hovers over their desks.

“Joong?” the teaching assistant asks, “Did you start the exercise?”

“Oh yeah,” he responds quickly, “I’m working with them.”

Seonghwa has known him for so long that the lie was obvious, but he remembers their conversation the previous week about their relationship (or lack thereof). He vaguely nods and walks away instead of calling him out and nagging at him to work harder like he would have if they were still boyfriends.

The redhead bursts out laughing once Seonghwa is at a good distance. “Joong?” he repeats in a lovey-dovey tone to mock the couple. Hongjoong scoffs, kicking the back of his desk.

“Listen, kid,” he starts, “You’ve got it all wrong. Park and I are basically strangers at this point. Now let’s focus on the exercise, alright?”

“Sure, ‘cause strangers know each other’s Starbucks orders and buy each other drinks.”

“Okay, smartass.” Hongjoong is annoyed now. “I knew Seonghwa and now I don’t. He’s just my teaching assistant, and I’m not a senior, and you’ve gotta get your nose out of shit that isn’t your business.”

“I’m really sorry about Taehyun, he just likes being right,” the brunette says before the boy now named Taehyun can speak up again. Hongjoong sinks into his chair and waves it off, picking up his pen and beginning to write in his notebook. Despite his focus now on the exercise Seonghwa assigned, he can’t help but have Taehyun’s words ring in his ears. Why did he buy his teaching assistant, now a stranger to him, a drink?

Seonghwa finally sits down at his desk and notices the iced americano. He furrows his eyebrows and lifts it up, noticing his last name written on the cup. When his brain recognizes the owner of the handwriting, he smiles and happily takes a sip. Though the drink was still cold, the ice melted a bit and he actually felt warm inside. He looks at the student in the back of the class sulking in his chair and grins.

“Hyung, you have a folder? This is college, we’re not supposed to be this organized.” Mingi laughs, taking a seat next to Hongjoong, whose items were spread on the table. He places his plate full of food and his cup of soda at the edge of the table to make sure he doesn’t get anything on Hongjoong’s work. “Thanks for swiping me in, by the way.”

“No problem, I don’t even use half of my meal swipes anyways, so just let me know if you wanna use any more,” the older says while he reads over the review sheet Seonghwa gave his class.

“Wait, what’s this?” Mingi asks, and before Hongjoong can stop him, he takes out one of the papers in his folder. It’s a graded homework assignment, and on the top is Seonghwa’s handwriting thanking him for bringing him coffee the previous week. “No way, Seonghwa hyung’s your music business TA?”

Hongjoong snatches the paper back quickly. “How did you know?”

“Seonghwa hyung’s handwriting is so recognizable, how was I not supposed to know?” he retorts. “You bought him coffee? Oh my God, are you guys back on speaking terms?”

“No!” he hastily defends. “Our relationship is strictly a TA and his student.”

Mingi leans back, taking a sip of his soda. “That’s kinda sexy.”

“Jesus fucking Christ,” Hongjoong curses, “You’re literally sick in the head.”

“You guys are the same age!” he argues. “It’s not illegal. Just imagine making out in an empty classroom on top of the—”

The older boy covers his ears. “You’re disgusting. There has to be a clause in his contract that’s like, he can’t make out with any students in the classrooms regardless of age.”

“Hyung, I’m pretty sure he’s hitting on you, though,” the taller boy tells him honestly, taking a bite of his burger. He sets it down and uses his index finger to point out Seonghwa’s handwriting on Hongjoong’s assignment. “No TA who’s just your TA would write a message like that. If he wasn’t flirting, he’d probably just thank you in person and not make such a big deal about it.”

“Writing a thank you note is not a big deal, Mingi.” Hongjoong rolls his eyes. “He’s literally said before that he’s treating me like his other students. I’m treating him like a TA.”

“You buy your TAs coffee?” Mingi questions incredulously.

Again, Hongjoong wonders why he even bought Seonghwa coffee in the first place, and why he continued to do so this week as well. The Taehyun guy had interrogated him about it once more, yet his answers remained the same. He pushes the thought of him lying about his relationship with and feelings for Seonghwa to the back of his mind and pulls out his notebook. “Shut up, I’ve got my second midterm for music business next week and I cannot afford to tank it again. Stop bothering me.”

Mingi scoffs. “You’ll do fine, hyung.”

This time, he actually does feel like he’ll do fine. For the first midterm, he hadn’t even reviewed any of the content until the day before the exam, when he crammed all of the information in one night. He remembered the feeling of anxiousness the day of that exam, and contrasts it to how confident he feels taking the second midterm. He doesn’t bounce his legs or chew on his pencil this time around. Instead, his heartbeat calms from hearing Seonghwa’s voice in the back of his head telling him the answers to the test.

Hongjoong walks into recitation on time the next week, though the TA hadn’t arrived yet. He straightens his shoulders and holds his head up high. He leaves Seonghwa’s drink on his desk and strides towards his usual seat in the back of the class. Taehyun watches him with an amused smile. “Hyung, you seem to be in a good mood today.”

“Yeah, and you can’t ruin it for me this time!” he jokes, sticking out his tongue.

The brunette, who he found out was Kai during the previous recitation, turns around. “Ooh, hyung, did you ace the midterm?”

He grins. “I mean, I didn’t ace it, but I did way better than the first one.”

“Congrats!” Kai cheers, but quickly frowns. “I failed.” Taehyun laughs loudly at this, clapping his hands.

“How’d you do, smartass?” Hongjoong nods his head towards Taehyun, defending Kai.

“I’m so glad you asked,” Taehyun boasts. “I got an A.”

Kai boos him, giving him two thumbs down, but is interrupted by Seonghwa bursting through the doors of the classroom minutes later than when recitation was supposed to start. He carries a pile of test papers in his arms and as soon as he drops them all onto his desk, he picks up the exams that corresponded with their class and starts to hand them out.

“Why am I nervous even though I’ve seen my grade already?” Kai asks rhetorically.

“Because you failed,” Taehyun answers with a huge smile on his face.

Hongjoong watches the two bicker like a couple and feels a little weird. He was starting to feel comfortable with the duo, though he never really imagined that he’d make friends so much younger than him. When he thought about going back to school, he always feared being ostracized for being old and that he’d never be able to relate with his classmates. The fact that he was beginning to allow them into his circle, that he was finally being a regular college student, made him feel a bit proud of himself. Yet, on top of that, as Kai playfully pushes Taehyun with a loving glint in his eyes, he can’t help but see himself and Seonghwa in them.

A body blocks his line of sight and he looks up to see Seonghwa beaming down at him. He holds out his test paper. “Good job, Joong.” Hongjoong bows his head as a thank you, taking the exam in his hands and looking at the score on the top of the paper, as well as the smiley face and heart drawn right beside it.

Taehyun and Kai both turn to Hongjoong, holding in their laughter. He rolls his eyes and kicks the back of Kai’s chair. “Not you too.”

“I’m starting to see what Taehyun meant about you two being a thing,” he admits, which makes the oldest boy lean his head back and groan in frustration.

“Haven’t you guys ever considered that maybe dating a TA is against school rules or something?” Hongjoong proposes, and Taehyun raises his eyebrows.

“Rationalization is literally a defense mechanism, hyung, I learned it in Psych,” Taehyun teaches him. “Actually, now that I think about it, you’ve already gone through repression and denial. Perhaps this is a step.”

Kai looks at Hongjoong’s angry expression and rests his hand on Taehyun’s shoulder. “I’m not gonna protect you when hyung beats you up one day.”

Hongjoong walks into the restaurant alongside Seonghwa, cursing the fact that he acquired the habit of arriving to hangouts early from his ex-boyfriend. He wonders how he was able to time it perfectly that he literally arrived at the same time as his ex-boyfriend, but the thought is quickly driven out by his brain going into panic over having to be alone with Seonghwa outside of an educational setting.

“I didn’t know you were coming,” the teaching assistant says as they take a seat at a large table. “The kids don’t tell me anything.”

The kids, Hongjoong repeats in his mind, overanalyzing the word. Does he mean our friends that are younger than us, or our children who we’ve raised as a divorced couple? The idea of it being the latter makes him smile a bit. “Yeah, they didn’t tell me either. I’m sure Mingi told everyone else that you’re the TA for my business class, so they probably set this up since we’re on speaking terms again.”

“We were always on speaking terms.” Seonghwa takes a sip of the water he ordered. “We just thought we needed some time apart, but now I wish they had always invited us both rather than one or another.”

Hongjoong feels uncomfortable talking about their breakup, so he only shrugs, and Seonghwa knows him well enough to understand it means to stop talking about it. Both of their phones ding, revealing a notification of a group chat they’ve both been added into along with the rest of the group telling them that they’ll be running late.

“What made you want to get your master’s?” Hongjoong’s mouth works faster than his brain, yet he immediately regrets asking the question. Seonghwa visibly tenses but smiles warmly.

“I just wanted to stay in school for longer,” he tells him, rubbing the back of his neck. “No particular reason, really.”

Though the answer only made Hongjoong more confused, he realizes Seonghwa doesn’t really want to talk about it, so he drops it quickly with a simple nod. “That’s cool.”

“I think it’s cooler that you went back to school, though.” The TA grins. “Four years is a big gap and it must be scary because everyone’s so younger than you now.”

Hongjoong lets out a small laugh and finds himself relaxing. “Yeah, it really is. I didn’t really think I’d be making friends, especially with eighteen-year-olds. There’s this kid in music business who thinks I’m a senior, even though I keep telling him I’m a first year. He likes to prove me wrong.”

“I mean, it could have been easier calling yourself a senior since you wouldn’t have to explain why you entered so late,” he comments.

“Yeah, that’s true,” he agrees, “But if I’m gonna be here for four years, I don’t wanna have to lie. And the kid’s nice, I wouldn’t mind being his friend, so I’d rather not deceive him from the start.”

“That’s sweet. It’s nice you’re making friends. You read people well, so I trust that they’re a good person who probably doesn’t even care about your age.” Seonghwa makes eye contact with Hongjoong, and he feels himself falter under his stare. Hongjoong looks away.

“Midterms are officially over,” Seonghwa starts a new conversation. “How’d they go for you?”

The red haired boy forces a smile, “They went well. Not the best, but good.”

“As long as you’re doing your best, then that’s the best,” he remarks. Hongjoong’s heart races.

“Park,” he says suddenly, gripping onto the table tightly. Seonghwa looks concerned and waits for Hongjoong to continue, but right when he opens his mouth again, their mutual friend Yunho’s voice fills the restaurant. Their friend group approaches their table, Jongho wrapping his hand around Hongjoong’s shoulder and another friend, Wooyoung, patting Seonghwa on the back as a greeting. They fall silent rather quickly.

“Did we interrupt something?” the last friend to enter, San, asks hesitantly. Hongjoong purses his lips and shakes his head firmly. Seonghwa sighs.

“I’m starving,” Hongjoong says instead, “Sit down, let’s order.”

They don’t talk for the rest of the day. When Seonghwa arrives at recitation the following week, he notices Hongjoong’s seat in the back empty, and can hear the two kids in front of him loudly questioning where he is. Seonghwa goes around handing out graded homework assignments, and the redhead he recognizes as Taehyun pauses before accepting his.

“Mr. Park?” the younger boy stops the TA rather than uttering his usual thanks. “Do you know why Hongjoong hyung didn’t come to class today? Is he running late?”

Seonghwa shakes his head. “No, he didn’t mark his absence or email me so I’ve got no idea.”

He can tell Taehyun had more to say, but instead the brunette besides him places a hand on his shoulder. Taehyun glances at Kai and simply nods, understanding his facial expression. Seonghwa moves on but spends the rest of the day wondering what that was about.

Hongjoong doesn’t show up to recitations or hand in his homework for the next two weeks. Not only is Taehyun and Kai wondering what went wrong, but Seonghwa also feels himself dragging his feet and dreading to walk into the classroom. He carries a cup of coffee that he doesn’t even drink regularly, setting it on his desk and looking longingly once again at the empty chair in the back of the classroom.

The first time Seonghwa sees Hongjoong again is a month later. It was snowing for the first time that winter, and students were outside, watching intently at the snowflakes falling. Some kids were lucky enough to pick up the small amount of snow piled up on the ground and shape them into snowballs, throwing them at their friends. Seonghwa’s running late to recitation and walks hurriedly across the snow covered pavement. He mistakenly steps on a slab of ice, his foot slipping off and he loses balance. He closes his eyes, ready for the impact, but feels a pair of hands steadily holding his back. He opens his eyes to a freshly dyed blue haired Hongjoong smiling down at him. With the added effect of snowflakes falling, he momentarily thinks he’s dreaming.

The student pulls up Seonghwa, letting go of his waist and allowing him to stand on his own. “Looks like you fell for me,” Hongjoong jokes, and Seonghwa blinks blankly at him.

“Why did you disappear for a month?” he asks.

Hongjoong tilts his head. “Needed some time for myself. Don’t worry, I’ll submit all the assignments I missed and I’m going to recitation today.” He checks his phone to see the time and widens his eyes. “Why aren’t you there yet?”

“Oh, right,” Seonghwa remembers, grabbing Hongjoong’s hand and jogging towards the building the classroom’s in. They arrive five minutes later than when recitation was supposed to start and Seonghwa only lets go after they enter the classroom. Hongjoong mentally curses him for it, knowing Taehyun definitely saw it.

“Hyung, you’re back!” Kai exclaims as soon as he reaches his desk. “And you have blue hair!”

“Thanks for noticing.” He chuckles, leaning back in his chair and struggling to catch his breath.

“Your hair looks good,” Taehyun also comments, “But you know what else I noticed? You and Park—”

“Shut it,” Hongjoong stops him by raising a hand to his face. “This is the first time I’ve felt good in weeks and I don’t want your weird theories to ruin it.”

“Hyung, you’re just giving me more material to make fun of you with.”

“Good morning, Park,” Hongjoong greets his teaching assistant brightly as he walks into the classroom and hands him his weekly iced americano.

Seonghwa smiles. “Joong, it’s the afternoon.”

The student only laughs and waves him off, heading towards his seat in the back of the class, behind his freshmen friends Taehyun and Kai. The latter turns around once Hongjoong sits down. “You seem to be ready for this final next week, hyung.”

“Yeah, I sure am,” he confirms. “If you’d finally like to know, I’m asking Seonghwa out after grades are published.”

Taehyun’s eyes widen. “Wait, you two really weren’t dating after all?”

“We did,” Hongjoong begins to explain, “Four years ago. We broke up because he went to college and I didn’t.”

“Hyung,” Kai whines, “That makes so much sense, why didn’t you just tell us?”

“Tell a couple of strange kids who didn’t even listen to me when I said I was a freshman the first time?” he rhetorically questions, sending a pointed look at Taehyun, who seems sheepish in response.

“How do you plan on asking him?” Taehyun asks.

“So you just want me to keep bugging Seonghwa hyung about if he’s finished grading his papers and then, when he’s done, invite him to the diner back in our hometown?” Yunho repeats after Hongjoong, who had enlisted his help for the confession. “All this just to get back together with your ex? I mean, sure I’ll do it, but seems a little too much.”

“You know I accidentally confessed to him in that diner. If I ask him out there, he’s definitely gonna say yes,” Hongjoong argues.

“He would’ve said yes regardless,” he counters. “Seonghwa hyung never got over you.”

“I just find that hard to believe.”

“How is it that hard when you never got over him either?” he remarks, and the blue haired boy falls silent. “But anyways, what happens if he doesn’t even have plans to go back home right after grading his papers? He’s also an RA I think, he might have to stay.”

“Then you’ll tell me where his dorm is and I’ll just go there myself,” Hongjoong says determinedly. “I’m going to ask him out no matter what.”

“Why are you waiting anyways?” Yunho wonders out loud. “He told me you ghosted him for like a month, couldn’t you have just asked him out instead of sulking?”

“I was not sulking, I was thinking,” he corrects, “And I don’t think he’s allowed to date a student. I don’t wanna get him in trouble.”

“The semester is literally ending,” the younger states.

“Exactly, I’ll just wait.”

Hongjoong sees Seonghwa once more during a review session, and then once again after he takes his final exam. Their group had decided to go back to their hometown together now that everyone’s finals have ended, and apparently Seonghwa was just going to grade all of his classes’ exams at home. He asks Hongjoong about how the exam went and he responds shortly saying he feels positive about it. They don’t talk much after that, as Jongho wants to show Hongjoong his final project for music production and Mingi suggests for Seonghwa to grade some papers on the train to save time.

It takes a few days for Seonghwa to grade all of the final exams, and that’s when Yunho messages Hongjoong saying he made plans with Seonghwa the next day at the diner. Hongjoong can’t help but feel nervous despite all of the hope his friends instilled in him that his former teaching assistant still likes him. He goes through his closet twice to pick the best outfit and after Wooyoung talks him into it, he puts on a red plaid skirt and feels himself becoming more confident.

When Hongjoong walks into the diner, minutes later than he was planning to, he immediately catches Seonghwa’s eyes. He heads directly towards him and Seonghwa stands up as well, stumbling slightly.

“Joong,” he says, “I didn’t know you would be here, Yunho asked me to hangout today.”

Hongjoong pulls out a chair at the table Seonghwa was originally sitting at. “Yeah, I know. Mind if I join you?”

“Of course not,” Seonghwa responds and watches Hongjoong sit down and cross his legs. “You look amazing, by the way.”

He grins. “Thank you. Have you ordered yet?”

“No, I was waiting for Yunho,” he answers, passing a menu to him. “Should I assume he’s not coming?”

“Yeah, it’s just me today,” Hongjoong tells him, opening the booklet and skimming through the options. He had already planned out everything for today, he didn’t even need to look at the food offered. “I’m in the mood for dessert.”

Seonghwa scoffs. “You never really changed, huh? I remember—”

He stops himself when he realizes he was going to bring up the day they started dating. He seemed to be a bit embarrassed at the fact that he still remembers the moment so vividly, but Hongjoong finds comfort in it. It means to him that Seonghwa will definitely recognize the parallels he’s going to purposely make and what they’re supposed to lead up to.

“What are you having?” Hongjoong asks instead of questioning what he was going to say.

The black haired boy focuses on the menu and smiles to himself. “I think I’ll get a milkshake. I’m not that hungry.”

Hongjoong grins. He definitely knows where this is going. “Wanna share?”

Seonghwa’s eyes light up. “Of course. Two straws?”

“Wouldn’t want it any other way,” he says.

“Seems like you remember too, then,” Seonghwa asserts, closing the menu he was holding and placing it on the table. Before Hongjoong could reply, he raises his hand and grabs a waiter’s attention to order. He does it fluently, ordering his milkshake (with emphasis on two straws) and a chocolate lava cake, which was the same thing Hongjoong ordered eight years ago.

“You seem to know my order better than me,” he teases after the waiter leaves.

“You’re unpredictable, Joong,” he groans. “One minute it seems like you’ve moved on and the next minute you’re telling Yunho to set us up on a date and reminiscing about our first day as a couple. Made me think I know where you’re going with this but at the same time, I can never be sure with you.”

“Well, which do you want it to be?” Hongjoong takes a sip of the free water the waiter gave him and leans in closer. “Would you prefer me to have moved on or to want you back?”

He sucks in a breath and bites down on his lip nervously. “Congrats on your A on the final, Joong. I knew you could do it.”

“You’re unpredictable too, you know?” he declares, sighing loudly. “Thanks, but I’m not your student anymore, Hwa.”

“We’re back to Hwa,” Seonghwa says to himself. “I’m just really confused.”

“What’s so confusing about the fact that I still like you?!” Hongjoong exclaims, and when the room suddenly becomes quiet from his loud voice, he slouches in embarrassment. “I didn’t plan to say that so suddenly.”

The quiet of the room is interrupted by Seonghwa’s booming laugh. He doubles over, clutching his stomach. “This is exactly like the first time, too.”

Hongjoong’s face turns red. “Whatever, I like you, stupid.”

“I like you too, dummy,” Seonghwa beams. “Do you wanna get back together?”

“That’s not how it goes,” he complains. “You were supposed to say, ‘Will you be my boyfriend?’ and I would say, ‘Only if you let me be president of the club.’ But in this case I’d say, ‘Only if you let me tell people my boyfriend’s a super senior instead of a teaching assistant.’”

“I hate you, just say I’m a graduate student, which I am, by the way.”

“No, then they’ll definitely know you were my teacher.”

“Teaching assistant, not teacher. That reminds me, though, Mingi told me you wanted to make out with me on my desk.”

“Oh my God.”


End file.
